My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
