she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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