she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
