I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
PS: I just woke up from my shower
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
