I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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