I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize