Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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