He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
