I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
