Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
