Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
