isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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