Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Pants are for mortals
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
