Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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