lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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