thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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