her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
