so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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