They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
