I want to make a zoo with you.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
