when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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