Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
