In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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