I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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