It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
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