She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
