Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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