Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
