I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
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