I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
