the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Come back. Shots need mouths.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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