New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
