She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
pray to the hookup gods
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Randomize
