Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
