You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
