I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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