im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
And then he peed in my hair
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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