you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
