2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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