pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
