Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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