did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
