he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
