Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
