I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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