Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
