I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize