The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
We are all done wearing pants today
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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