There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Randomize
