so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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